Burlington is beautiful.  It's just what i needed for my head and my heart.  I've seen wild foxes and bunnies, and even walked along the beach.

Betsy makes us cupcakes and grilled cheese, and just the feeling of being in a home with a family is a feeling that can't be replicated.

I feel ungrateful and petty for being for spending the past month moping in NYC with Mariel.

Sometimes I just don't understand the blasé.

There's a difference between overindulgence in the beauty that is a pair of Christian Louboutin heels,

and being so obsessed with yourself that you get excited by your shadow.

Maybe I'm just going to the wrong places but

the scene is dead and I'm still restless.

I think at the end of the day

I'm just a small town kind of girl in a big city kind of world.

A friend was recently baffled by how I could be uninspired by the opportunity and fever of the city

but being back in the countryside has made me feel more creative and in tune with myself than I've felt all summer.

Kind of like this...

And no more of this

(at least not in excess)

I think this time away will give me the reinvigoration that I need to look forward to another year of creating and meeting new people in the city.  It's just been a case of wrong time wrong place this summer. 

There's a reason there's a song called

New York I Love You But You're Bringing Me Down

because that's exactly how I would describe my relationship with the island.

Anyways, here's a little preview of the birthday weekend.

more to come.

xx

CMS

Distant Silhouettes Somehow, We Shared a Cigarette Somewhere

This weekend I found hidden treasure, I climbed dark stairways into exciting places, I held hands with the kind of people who don't let go, I turned off all of the lights and spent a night in candles, I unplugged the TV and started a new book, I talked about the future with the people I know will always be a part of it, I wrapped myself in sequins, I got too drunk with the first person I ever got too drunk with back when we were too young to be too drunk, 

and 

we were the mad ones, the ones who never yawn or say a common place thing, but burn, burn, burn, like fabulous roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars, and in the middle you see the blue centerlight pop, and everybody goes 'awww."

(10 points to those who can identify the quote, because you've read the book, not because you're a hipstar)

It was just what I needed. An amazing birthday. And a reawakening of senses that I have let dull in the passing weeks.

Tomorrow I leave for Vermont to be reunited with Mariel

and then after a rendezvous in Montreal it's back to the dirty south, where my spirit can be free for just a little bit longer before fall term begins.

I think I will feel like this

(photos brought to you by a spread by the inspirational Antonella Arismendi

titled On The Road. Which seems to be the theme for my day if you've picked up on the trend, you literary beat buffs.)

Anyways...

Here are some things that resulted from the felicitations

thank you amelia for the perfect records
thanks mama Jackie for the Diana F+ Collette
and the new book i can't put down

and the Marc Jacobs boxer booties and Jeremy Kelsey crocodile loafers, both of which give me terrible blisters, but I'm okay with that.

and some new touches to the a.p.t.

this was us on our night that we couldn't stop listening to au revoir simone

can you tell?

I'm learning to remember that everything works out in the end, and if they don't then it's not the end. And what you like, you will find again.

xx

CMS

Sleeping with the Romantics

Lazy on rainy city days.

The thunder tonight sounds like bombs.

My dad, Amelia and Michael are all here and life is good.

Pictures of the birthday festivities coming soon.

xx

CMS

Paranoid Lunacy

Our apartment might be inspired by petifores, flowers and Alice in Wonderland,

but two catwomen live here.

and if you know me at all, this video basically explains everything

and it's inspired by the femme fatal designs of Jonathan Kelsey

and if you know anything about me, or have ever seen my closet, you know that I take shoes very seriously.  If I could be naked for the rest of my life and just wear amazing footwear and maybe agent provocateur lingerie, I would be the happiest dominatrix in the world.

But until the gays take over the world and make public nudity de-categorized as indecent exposure, I guess my fetish for impropriety will have to be confined to the walls of west 10th.

And the Prada lookbook for Fall/winter '09 is rad

Oh and this is a very important announcement

My birthday is in 8 days!

My sister Amelia and my husband Michael are both coming up to stay at west 10th

And so is Papa RJ

It's going to be a celebration for all celebrations

And I already found the dress (which will remain unseen by any eyes but mine until the 25th, but let's just say it was the vintage sequin steal of the century)

and if you want to make me the happiest girl in the world, you will add these shoes to my collection so I can stop walking all the way to the Prada store in Soho just to visit them.

As you can tell from my last post, and the beginning of this one, Alice in Wonderland is a very important part of me.

Mariel and I have decided that the story that explains our lives merits a quote scrolled on the living room wall 

`But I don't want to go among mad people,' Alice remarked.

`Oh, you can't help that,' said the Cat: `we're all mad here. I'm mad.  You're mad.'

`How do you know I'm mad?' said Alice.

`You must be,' said the Cat, `or you wouldn't have come here.'

We're also obsessed with this Vogue photo shoot interpretation of the story and featuring some haute couture heavy hitters

See it here

and be inspired.

And in honor of being told I look like Zooey Deschanel for the umpteenth time, here is gift, because at least I apparently resemble someone who does good work.

xx

CMS

I've Got This Feeling That I've Been Here Before

I feel like this,

So I woke up far earlier this morning than my usual sleeping patterns reasonably allow, (especially for someone who's been in a semi-nocturnal state for a good portion of the summer and has had small periods of not seeing the sun light).  But after some frustrating tossing and turning in my new anthropologie bedding, I saw the beautiful New York day outside of my window illuminating the lime green leaves of my favorite tree and decided to get up.  The apartment feels like home, so until it's time to go out for our nightly romp, Mariel and I have been spending a lot of days camping in the living room.  

Sometimes we bake cake

and listen to Au Revoir Simone and feel like we're living in Le Petit Trianon

And then sometimes we feel like we're melting into the walls

while we deal with sassy neighbors, angry foreign men, handymen, water leaks, doing the wash, dust and rumors.

 So, I think today should be a day for brunch with old friends, lying in the grass, making art and maybe even seeing some at Moma.

But Anyways,

Here are a few photos of what living at West 10th has been like the past two weeks

Basically I've been getting far too bogged down in the small stuff, and while I watch summer slowly fade into a new semester at school, I'm trying to learn that the possibilities are endless and we should all live a life kind of like this

oh and P.S.

I really miss Ryan and I'm really upset with Fire Island for taking him away.

xx

CMS

Celebration Guns

So I'm back in The City

and it's just how i wanted it to be.

I feel like Mariel and I are in this book

Because we've been staying up all night and sleeping all morning, and waking up in the afternoon to make tea and panini and watch Dexter. (it just keeps us occupied while we wait for the next True Blood)

Ryan sleeps over a lot

This was us one morning.

In my bed, which happens to be the best bed in the world.

Life right now looks like this

But it's not all fun and games. Mariel and I are having to take on many big girl tasks, some things we never even thought we would ever be dealing with, like:

• Which ways do tilted wall mounts tilt?
• What is dry wall?
• Does the price of the drill really make that much of a difference?
• If we turn on the oven and it smells like gas is that bad?

It's all coming together with time though, and eventually our apartment will look like the homosexual opium den that we imagined it would.

The gays are coming over soon so we can go out, so I should probably go, but if you've seen either of these boys let me know.

And don't worry, Mariel, Sam (her brother who is a current house guest),

and I attempted to make a stop motion snuff film, and the pictures are coming soon to my blog near you.

xx

CMS